Caution: Ten Modes of Transport to Avoid

Take a lesson from seasoned pros like us. These modes of transport are NOT your best option…

 1. Hitchhiking – Not only is it dangerous, but you could get trapped in the car for hours with mimes… or ‘80s sitcom stars.
 hot air ballon ablaze
2. Hot Air Balloon – Two words: “Balloon Boy.” It didn’t work for him, plus if you’ve seen “The Wizard of Oz,” you know how unwieldy these things can be… 
 
3. Trunk of Your Friends’ Car – June in Nashville = hot. Plus how long can you really ride with a spare tire chafing your butt?

4. Camelback and/or Pack Mule – We enjoy dromedaries and donkeys as much as the next guy, but the trip ventured this way could take forever.

5. The Partridge Family Bus – Sure you’re coming to Nashville to “get happy,” but for every cute Susan Dey there’s a freak like Danny Bonaduce. Just sayin’…
 
6. Teleportation – Some fans have ended up lost in the space-time continuum humming along to “Sincerely” by The McGuire Sisters.
 
7. Water Taxi – Bad option mainly because Nashville is, you know, inland and all…

8. Dog Sled – CMA Music Festival isn’t the Iditarod, though we do like the puppies.

9. Running – You want to save your strength to party in Nashville!  (Plus, unless you’re Forrest Gump, you may run out of steam 10 or 20 miles into the journey…)

10. Hang Gliding – As fun as being a human kite may sound, one stiff wind could land you in Brazil…or Birmingham.

What are your favorite and least favorite ways to travel to CMA Fest? And, would you attempt any of these ill-advised methods? Let’s hear it!

To Follow Cory: www.Twitter.com/ChappedMan

About Cory Chapman

@CountryMusic marketing exec. Animal lover. Social liberal. Half-marathoner. TV ratings tracker. Dig @BestBuy, @Target, @EW, travel, cruising, fitness & @Reba.
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11 Responses to Caution: Ten Modes of Transport to Avoid

  1. Jake says:

    Funny stuff. I would also hate to arrive by Big Wheel or human canon ball…

  2. Kev says:

    Erm, No. 7 …… Nashville might be inland but that’s one hell of a big river it sits on!!

  3. Denise says:

    I laughed.

    Makes me think of a couple years ago, though, and how a few Bonnaroo concert-goers got to BNA but had no way to get the rest of the way. They literally did bum rides off strangers to get there.

    Hey, whatever floats your boat!

  4. Debbie says:

    Flying with my CMA FEST Redneck girlfriends on Southwest Airlines and hope that we get a happy & Tolerent crew ! Of course, starting with an adult morning beverage before take off is preferred.

    Least favorite? Simply not getting to go at all !!

  5. Deb Jackson says:

    Walking or running doesn’t seem too bad when I’m 15 min from downtown Nashville. But I’m no Forrest. I’ll take driving.

  6. Kristen says:

    Me and my friends will be riding our Harley’s down again from MN for the event! Can’t wait!!!!!!!!!!!

  7. Chip says:

    Arriving by ambulance is never good….. you make all the lighsts, but it’s usually for all the wrong reasons.

  8. Martin F. says:

    I’m guessing that “starting out in London, England and flying via Newark” is somewhat unconventional too, but that’s what we’re doing. Second time in the States for me, first for my partner. Loving the line-up so far. Bring it on! :-)

  9. Cory Chapman says:

    Martin F.: Glad you’re coming back!

    Kristen: You and your friends ever take the Harleys to Sturgis?

    Chip: Good un’!

    Deb: If you like to run, stay tuned to CMAfest.com for an interesting announcement coming soon!

    Denise: Those Bonarroo-goers would’ve had an easier time getting to downtown Nashville from BNA than to Manchester… You should’ve recruited ‘em. Ha!

    Kev & Sha: You got me! Maybe water taxi is the perfect way to arrive!

    Thanks, y’all. Keep the comments coming!

  10. hailey says:

    DUDE!!!!!! I don’t care wat u say. im taking the partrige family bus there wethter u like it or not.

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